Sunday, January 31, 2010

A lesson in NOT being in control

As I was rushing out of my office on Thursday to get in a quick lunch with Carson, I managed a completely ungraceful a crowded hallway full of college students. Several students stopped to make sure I was OK. I picked up myself up, said "Of course, I'm fine," dusted myself off and walked (a little stiffly) to my car. Once in my car, I couldn't make it out of the parking lot before tears of pain starting running down my face. Great...stuck in my car with an ankle that probably shouldn't be driving. I decided to skip lunch with Carson (figured the tears and limping might embarrass him) and drove home. By then, I could barely walk and managed to shuffle myself inside and did what any responsible, grown adult would do...I called my mommy!!!

I don't do well with pain...or not being in control. I figured when the throbbing stopped, I'd drive right back to work and no one would be the wiser to my inglorious fall (except for the 50 or so students who witnessed it). Well, the throbbing didn't stop and finally Perry came home and took me to an urgent care. Verdict - one broken ankle.

My first question - can I drive with this thing on? Nope. So, I've been stuck at home hobbling around on crutches and relying on others to attend to my every wish and chore. It's been humbling being in a position where I have to rely on others. I'm just not used to that. And I don't like seeing my house becoming cluttered because no one else seems to "see" the clutter. And I don't like having to rely on fast food because I can't stand in the kitchen to cook something healthier. This just bites!

And, did I mention that Friday was my birthday? Yes, I spent my birthday (let's just say my 29th birthday) in pain, at home by myself, on crutches. Elise offered to make Chex Mix for me, until she realized you have to bake it to get the yummy flavor. Perry worked late so the kids had to fend for themselves for dinner (that was my gift to them...snacks for dinner!).
But, all belly aching aside, I do have some wonderful friends who have offered to help drive and fix meals. Our church service this morning (finally got OUT of the house!) was on service and serving others. After church, I came home and started making calls to find rides for the week to get to work, kids to school, etc. Making those calls was one of the most humbling and difficult things I've done. Don't get me wrong, no one turned me down and everyone was more than willing to help. But it was painful to have to ASK for help. And when friends have called me for help in the past, I've always been happy to help. That experience, combined with our church service, left me challenged to find new ways to help friends in need.
Now, I just need to accept that I'm not in control. I hope this ankle heals quickly and I can back to driving soon.
The other lesson I've learned is that one should shave more often in winter. You never know when strangers will be looking at one's horribly UNshaved, winter white legs (hypothetically speaking, of course).


Sandra said...

Poor you... Take care of yourself and I hope you heal quickly. I wished I lived closer, I would bring you some pumpkin bread and chocolate chip cookies :-)

Super Mommy said...

Oh my Gretchen. I'm so sorry you've broken your ankle...your humor is still there though (one reason I like you so!). Yes, you should shave and wear clean underware! LOL

Happy belated Birthday ... hoping you heal fast the meantime you can catch us up on your life via your blog ;0)

Vivian M said...

Get well soon! I can so relate, sine I am bedridden with a back injury. I am glad you have friends that can help!

Tammie said...

Okay Ms. G. It's time to start blogging again! I miss your updates!