Elise came out of her room last night around 10pm very sad. She crawled up in my lap and said, "I miss my China mommy." We talked, she cried and my heart broke for my little girl.
I know she's always going to carry this hole in her heart and have to deal with the emotions that accompany knowing her birth parents gave her up. The fact that she knows nothing about her birth family and little about the realities of what life might have been like in China just add to the hurt.
This is not the first time we've had this conversation. She'll go in phases. But clearly this has been on her mind lately. She said she has a hard time not crying in school because she thinks about her China mommy all day.
We pray for her China mommy and I assure Elise that her China mommy did love her because she left her in a safe place (we don't even know this for sure). We talk about other friends of hers that don't live with the mommy who gave birth to them. We talk about how some mommies can't take care of their babies.
I know my joy at parenting this child comes at the expense of heartache for others. I celebrate her in my life but she grieves the loss of her first family.
So, for those of you who have walked this path, what words of wisdom do you have? What comforting words do you share with your child? How do you try to ease that heartache they carry?